Living Through It
by ArcadiaAllbright
Summary: After life gets you down, you have to get up and take it by a storm. Arcadia Allbright makes her way through life solving crimes and trying to make a life of her own. First Person P.O.V., C.S.I. Level 3, Reviews Enjoyed.
1. Two Murders, One Man

Life is full of 'if's and 'if only's, 'but's and 'however's , and 'sometimes' and 'always'. There is no between, there is only the beginning and end in some cases.

Cases being work cases, the ones where you catch the bad guys in a slam dunk or the bad guy gets away because something happened and you let the evidence pass you by.

Cases being home cases, where you go home everyday to a life you want or don't want, hoping it never changes or that the next day you come home and something different and extraordinary happens.

Then, the 'but' comes when you start to want something more. 'But this is my life', 'but this is the way it's always been'.

Then, on occasion, it's the 'if'. 'If only I wanted to change', 'if I wasn't so scared of it, it'd change it'.

There is one thing I'm going to do, and it's start from the middle. I don't want to give away my life all in one story, one sitting, one listen.

This way, if you like what you hear, you can keep listening, watching, waiting, for something to change and to make me tell you the beginning. Right now, all I'm doing is going through life, pretending to be okay. Sometimes, I am. Sometimes, I wish I had died five years ago. You won't know why until you listen, and you won't listen without a good middle.

So this is it.

Today sucked. Those two words defined my life like any other. Today, those were the words I said to myself.

We took one of those cases this week. Normally I like my cases, but not this one. A girl, about my height, my weight, and with my general features, was killed last night.

I was the first on the scene with Warrick and Sara. They were the ones on the case this week. There was usually never more than two working a case, but we had a shortage of cases this day and we tripled up for this one.

The other cases were just some stabbing of a forty-year-old and one was a home invasion.

I thought I got lucky. I was wrong.

We were outside of my old collage campus. The building I lived in was two more over, so this was a school building, not living. There was only the one girl. I didn't have to be too close to realize that she was a rape victim.

Sometimes, you can just see it.

I must have been walking decently slow because Warrick came up behind and asked if I was alright. I nodded like I always do and I let him push me along a little. I wasn't thrilled to be back here and this case was going to make my life hell if I knew who had done it.

Sara was already to the girl. She was flashing her light up and down the body, looking for anything on her that might be of evidence before David took her away. I knelt around her head next to David. I looked over at his clipboard and nodded.

"So she was strangled." It wasn't a question, I already knew.

"Yea, from the looks of it out here, she was beaten with a hard object, probably something long and thicker at the tip, raped then strangled." He didn't sound happy about it, but it was his job to look over them while they laid there waiting to be taken back to the morgue.

"She's wearing a hoodie." I noted. I made Sara look up at me by saying that.

"I don't understand why she's wearing a hoodie and a skirt outside on a night like this." Sara concluded.

"Maybe the hoodie isn't hers." I lifted up the side hood to get a better look at where the strings should have been. "I bet that the string isn't on her, is it?" I looked back at Sara and she shined her flashlight all around the body.

"Not from what I can see." She looked back at me, kind of sad. "Do you think the killer strangled her with her own hoodie string?" I nodded at her.

"The size of the marks are about the same as a hoodie string, it's not here and I doubt it's anywhere on the body." I stood up and looked around a bigger area of where she was laying, farther out than where Sara looked. "Maybe he discarded it close by. Warrick, do you want to have a look around? Me and Sara can head up to see if she lived on campus."

"Sure," He turned and looked at the cops, "I'm gonna need a few of you with some lights. We're looking for a red hoodie string pretty close by." He looked back to me and nodded. It was like he knew that something was wrong, but he didn't know what it was.

Sara and I made our way to the living area, watching from a distance as the coroner took the body away.

"Poor girl." I said. It was meant for only me but I must have been talking out loud. Sara answered me.

"I know what you mean. I don't understand why people do some things to each other." I watched from the corner of my eye as she shook her head. "Hey, back there you said 'he'. How do you know it's a he?"

I made up some lie pretty quickly, maybe a little too quick. "I hear rape and I think man until we get told there is no semen or she was raped with a foreign object." She nodded her head at that and agreed. I don't think she liked the subject either, but for a different reason.

An hour later, we had already finished searching the victims room with no luck. We managed to get a name and age – Marcy Wringer, aged 19 – but that was it. We headed back down to Warrick and something flashed underneath my flashlight.

I turned it and to much surprise and relief, an average sized, red string came into my view.

"Hey, hand me tweezers and a bag." I said over my shoulder to Sara. She handed them over with grace and I took them to bag the string. "I think we may have found our weapon." I stood up and we continued over to Warrick. He had just put his phone away when he turned to us and started talking.

"The victim is prepped and ready to have a full autopsy done. Doc said to get there as soon as we're done so we can be there." Warrick said, delightful that we were about to leave. I don't think he liked collage so much.

"Well, you two go ahead to the autopsy, I'm going to take this string to Hodges and see if it matches the vic's hoodie." Sara said, gesturing for me to hand her the bag. Of course I did, though. I didn't want it.

"Hold up, you found the string?" Warrick was let down, to say the least. "I've been looking all over this place for an hour and you just waltz up here with the string." He shook his head and headed back to the cars. "I'll be damned." I laughed at him and Sara laughed along with me. We started to drive back to the lab when a person caught my eye. I didn't say anything at the time, but I know I should have. It was a man, over average height at 6"2'. We were already driving and it could have just been a bystander, so I left it alone.

Back at the lab, Grissom and Greg pulled in about the same time we did. Greg had just gotten his start in the field and he was working with Grissom on almost every case. Warrick headed in before us, Sara walked along side Grissom. I didn't know what they were talking about, they were too far ahead. Greg caught up to me and started talking a mile a minute.

"Do you want to hear about my case?" He said, smiling like a dork. I looked at him and smiled back. That was his way of knowing to continue on. "So, the home invasion we got was about a girl, in her home, strangled."

"Was she raped?" I had to ask. He didn't answer for a minute so I looked at him and he was obviously confused.

"How did you know that?" I shrugged at him.

"It was just a lucky guess." I took his arm and he smiled right away. His whole demeanor changed when he was around me. I knew because I would watch him for a few minutes every once in a while when I had time to myself. He was calm on occasion but mostly he was wild and crazy, in his lab alone. Then other people would come around and he'd get serious unless they said something funny. But when I was alone with him, all I saw was smiles.

I liked it though. His smile made me smile.

We were in the morgue, all four of us surrounded the campus victim. He hair was about medium length, just passed her shoulders. Shoulders covered in bruises and marks. The first thing that came to mind was baseball bat. I've heard it before, seen it before, been through it before.

Doc started talking then, "So your vic, Marcy Wringer, was nineteen. She was average weight, a little on the short side. Caucasian. She had multiple bruising along the upper torso, around the neck. The obvious cause of death is strangulation, as told by the ligature marks around her neck." I was listening to him, fully and completely. But something was wrong, because I wasn't looking at my victim. I was looking at the home invasion victim.

"She was raped, not by a foreign object. I found semen in the vaginal area, I'm going to give it to one of you to take back to the lab." He stopped talking and I could tell it was because of me. "Cadi, I understand that you are the only female here, and they do look a lot like you, but I'm giving this to you so you can take it." I turned to him and he was handing me a sample of semen to take to the lab.

"What color are her eyes?" I asked him. I could feel everyone looking at me, but I just needed to know.

He looked confused for a minute before regaining his composure and taking his hand to her head and opening her eyes. "Blue." He said. I looked down. "Sweety, you eyes aren't blue, don't worry about it." Doc was concerned now. I looked back up, fully composed.

"And hers?" I gestured to the other victim. He shrugged and I continued speaking. "May I?" He nodded and I grabbed one glove from my personal stash and put it on. I took her eye lids and waited a moment before looking. I opened them.

"Green." I let the eye close and I backed away. I knew what it was, I knew what it meant, and I could tell the others understood too. I grabbed the sample and saluted them before walking out, leaving four men standing in the room, confused and worried.


	2. Confessionals

I made it up to Greg's old lab. He was in the field now and he had a replacement up there waiting for me. "Hey, Mia." She looked up from what she was doing and looked up. She smiled at me and put her hands on the desk, leaning forward.

"What can I do for you, Allbright?" I took the sample and showed it to her. She smiled again and nodded, knowing exactly what it was. "Semen sample." She chuckled. "Let me run it and in about five minutes we should have the DNA strain and any matches that are already in the system." She looked at me and I could see it in her eyes, she knew something was wrong when she said that. "Is everything alright?" I nodded at her.

"Yea, everything is fine. I need to go and see if anyone needs anything else." I turned to leave and ran into Greg, quite literally. He must have been holding the sample loosely because the sample broke and covered his hands and my shirt, right above my left boob.

"Gregory Sanders." I didn't want to yell but that was just gross. I turned and Mia was watching in full amusement. She started laughing uncontrollably enough that Nick came over to see what was happening.

"What's so funny, Mia?" He said, starting to laugh at her laugh. She didn't need to say anything, All she had to do was point, and she did, and Nick was looking over at me and Greg like someone had just told him the funniest joke in the world.

"Nick, don't laugh. Mia, can we get this off and processed?" I started to walk towards her but I stopped and turned towards Greg. "And Greg," He looked up, kind of sad. I had to go easy on him when he looked at me like that, it was just too cute. "Clean up." He did a half-smile at me and turned, keeping his hand away from everybody.

I turned back around and walked over to Mia, Nick followed. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd say that Greg was wanking it and got some of his finished business on you." Nick said, laughing.

"Ha ha, very funny." I told him before huffing my chest out towards Mia.

She looked at me like I was the crazy one. "Uh uh, you want me to touch your boobs, show me a good time first." I could hear Nick laugh from behind me. I looked over at him and winked, I could see in his eyes he knew what that meant.

"What kind of show would you like?" I smiled at her and her smile back wasn't as sweet as mine, it was the smile of pure evil genius. She held out her hand and gestured me to hand it over. "I thought maybe I could just shake my boobs at you for a minute or something. I didn't think you'd tell me to walk around half naked."

"Well, you better hurry and get another shirt, because I need that shirt. I don't want that semen to dry, it makes my job harder." I sighed and watched her over for a second before looking behind me. Nick was still smirking but what made it better, Greg walked back in. He cleaned up fast.

That was the kicker though, the last thing needed for me to do the deed. I'd probably do just about anything to impress Greg, and I knew he'd be impressed. I turned around and Mia still had the same smug look on her face and her hand was still out.

I stood up straight and slowly removed my shirt, mostly to not get fluids on any other part of my body. The other, small but still evident, reason was because there were two men in the room who needed a good show and a very eager lab tech.

Once the shirt was off, I could sense a lot more than just three people watching me. I handed the shirt to Mia and she gladly took it. "You know, if you put your hair down, you might be able to hide those boobs of yours." She chuckled again and turned to process the shirt.

I followed her advice and took my hair down. It wasn't up for more than an hour so there wasn't a bump in my hair. It flowed nicely down my body, considering it was long enough to cover down my torso and thick enough to basically have hair cover front and back. It was good that I straightened it this morning, otherwise it might not cover me fully.

I turned and Greg and Nick both had their hands in their pockets. I think we all know why. I pretended not to notice, but I think that just tipped them off more than I did. Greg took one hand out and handed my a damp towel. I grabbed it and moved my hair slightly, I heard Greg suck in air, and I wiped the top of my left boob.

I handed the towel back to Greg and his face flushed. "I guess I'd better go find a shirt now." I waved to them and left them all standing there. I could hear Mia like background music, "Down boys." That made me laugh a little.

I made my way to the locker rooms, feeling the stares as I walked. I found only a tank top so that had to do. I did enjoy having my hair down for once, so until I had to go to another crime scene, my hair was staying down.

I left the locker room and made my way to trace to see if they had anything from the string and the hoodie. Hodges wasn't doing much besides comparing the fabrics and running the fabric he got from Greg's case.

"Did you get a match back on that string and hoodie?" I sat down in a seat and watched him as he watched me.

"What are you doing?"

"Sitting, waiting for my results." I smiled at him and he squinted his eyes back at me, obviously thinking that I'm up to something.

"The string is a match to the hoodie. We got some skin cells on it though, so I suggest taking it back to DNA and seeing if they skin matches the semen and I'm going to get back to trying to figure out where this fabric came from.

I nodded my thank you at him and I went to go see Mia. I'm sure she had the semen back by now, so getting the DNA from the sting should be quick. I made it back to the lab and I saw Mia and Warrick. They were huddled close to each other, it made me think that there was something more than just friendship going on there.

Mia looked up and saw me, she made a soft noise and that signaled Warrick to stand up and act like nothing happened. "Nice to see you too." I said, have smirking. "I brought a string back for you, Mia."

She stood up to walk to the printer that had just gone off. "Well ,since the DNA is done now, I have full attention to that string." She laughed before looking at the results. "The person who raped both victims is the same man." She looked up from the paper. I could tell she wasn't happy.

"Then I'd like you to run the DNA from this string and compare it to the semen and we can see if we got a match." I told her, handing her the bag. She nodded at me before looking at her computer.

"That's odd." Mia said. That got Warrick and I's attention pretty quick. "I only looked at the paper, I didn't look at the screen yet. The semen matches from both victims, but that is the same DNA strain as these other three murder cases," She stood up straight. "and one rape case." I could see it in her eyes. She knew.

"We gotta go tell Grissom about these other murders." Warrick said. "Come on, Cadi." He gestured for me to go with him but I didn't move. "Hey, did you hear me? We have to go tell him and get this guy before he murders again."

"I'm staying here Warrick. It's not my case anymore." I told him, I didn't look at him yet but I could feel it in the way he lessened his breath.

"You're not allowed to be on this case anymore, are you?" He grabbed my arm and I looked into his eyes. Now, he knew. Grissom walked in just then.

"Come on you guys, we got another murder." Warrick looked at me for another second and then looked at Grissom.

"I'll come with you but I want to bring Sara." Warrick said. Grissom nodded and rushed him.

"Whatever you need, we just have to hurry." He rushed off and I thanked him for covering for me. He left and I could feel myself lose connection to everything for a minute. I suffered from a minor case of depression about five years ago and it felt like it was coming back again at full swing and more.

"Hey, Cadi." I was back, right where I was a few minutes ago, looking at Mia. "I know you can't be apart of this case anymore, but I think you need to tell the others." I nodded. I knew she was right, I just didn't want to believe it.

"Do you think you could pull me all those case files, ALL of them?" She nodded. "I'll have them ready for when they get back. I'll text Warrick and have him tell me this girl's name."

"Sure thing." She said. She was ready to help me at a moment's notice. I thanked her and headed off.

I ran into Greg on the way out, he knew that something wasn't right when he saw me. "What's wrong?" I didn't want to tell him, not like this, but I had to. I needed him to know that he could trust me, I needed him to know that I wasn't lying to him anymore. I needed someone to hold, and that was him.

"We need to talk." I said. I made my way to the locker room, it was more private than the break room. I walked in before Greg and sat down in front of my own locker. He sat down next to me, I could feel him hesitate. He wanted to ask what was wrong again, but I wasn't going to make him say it.

"Listen, I'm off the case." He looked shocked when I looked at him. His shock faded to sadness when he saw the way I was looking at him. "I'm off the case based on the situation that the rest of you would be put in if I was on it. I am apart of this case, kind of like a witness I guess, because this guy has murdered several times before. Three before these last three that we've had in the past two days." I wasn't looking at him anymore. I didn't want to see it in his eyes.

"I am a victim, to say the least, to the same guy based on DNA. It's the same guy that attacked me five years ago and left me for dead." I felt him grab me around my waist and pull me in. "He did the same thing to me as he did to the others, except the way he killed. The first two he beat to death, but when I lived he changed the way he killed to make sure they stayed dead." I sighed, I could feel the water trying to not fall down my face.

"There's something else I need to tell you." I did look at him this time and I smiled, because this is the only good thing that came from this experience. He nodded, ready for me to go on. I could see he was trying not to cry. I opened the locker that was in front of me, my own, and pulled out my wallet. Inside, I grabbed a picture that I had kept with me at all times. I handed it to him and he looked it over and he looked at me, shocked. He looked back down before speaking again.

It wasn't the bad kind of shocked. He seemed surprised, but happy. "You have a daughter." He said it softly, kindly, and lovingly. "You never told me." He looked at me and he was crying now. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want you to try to push your way into a situation that you didn't want to be in." I shook my head and hung it low. I was crying now. "Are you mad I didn't say anything?" I felt him move. His hand made his way up my back, across my shoulders, up my neck and to my cheek.

"No, I'm not mad." He chuckled to me. "I'm thrilled that you're telling me. I wished I would have known sooner but that doesn't change anything." He lifted my head up, he wanted to look at me. "I'm going to tell you something that I haven't told anyone about either." I nodded to him. I wanted to know, even if it may have been bad.

"I love you, Cadi." I sucked in air. No one had ever said it like that before. It was different. It was nice. It was what I needed. "And I do want to be apart of your life." He leaned in, he was so close, but he didn't make it.

Nick walked in and interrupted that moment. "Oops, sorry!" He said, half laughing. "We have all the case files from Mia. Grissom wants all of us there, even you Cadi." He left then.

"I guess that means I have some more explaining to do." I laughed, wiping the tears from his face. "Greg, I'm going to make it up to you, promise." I said, kissing his cheek. "Let's go, okay?"

He smiled and nodded at me, he was ready to be apart of my life and I wanted him there. All I needed to do now was move on and catch this guy before inviting my own child into this crime solving world.


	3. Pure Bliss

_**DISCLAIMER: I own none of CSI, only the case they are working, the people in it and my own characters.**_

_**...**_

We made our way to the others, walking by room after room through the winding halls of the building floor. It was less that a minute before all of us were together again; Grissom, Sara, Catherine, Warrick, Nick, Greg and I.

We walked in and all of the files were laid on the table in front of them. I was surprised to only find six files. I was less surprised when Warrick started to talk. "These are all of the murder cases that are all linked by the same guy. We don't know who he is yet but we better get this guy before he goes out again tonight." Every one was looking at the table so they didn't notice Warrick move around them and hand me a file. My file.

He whispered to me, "You're the one telling them." I nodded to him and moved forward. Still, no one noticed the movement around them. They were all fixed on the cases.

Catherine spoke up first. "It is just me or are the last four murders all brunettes with different eye colors?" Everyone looked toward the last four.

"All of them have similar facial features except the eyes. Brown hair, slim faces, Caucasian, only the last two have green eyes." Sara said. I could see them speculating, like they know they'd seen those features somewhere before but they weren't sure where. I turned to Warrick and Greg, they both nodded at me to go ahead.

I turned around and the other four were still fixed on the files when I took my picture from the folder I was holding and slid it in front of them. Nick looked first. "Hey, that looks like Cadi." I saw it then, he was confused, then shocked, then sad. He read the name out loud. "Arcadia Allbright." He looked at me and one-by-one, the rest of their heads turned to face me.

"I have a theory." I said. Grissom took the picture and held it underneath the last four.

"I'd be glad to hear it." He said, putting the picture back down, all of them facing me.

"Well, after I became a C.S.I., I looked into the file and found other cases and made my own time line." I walked to the end of the table and put the first picture in the corner, talking about it first. "The blonde girl, Janessa Alley, was killed on August 15, 1993 the same way as the second girl," I pulled her picture up along with Janessa's, "Mindy Newton, was. She was killed on February 15, 1994."

"They were killed six months apart?" Catherine asked and I nodded in response. "Why?"

"I don't know, but another six months after that, same day and month but the next year, I was attacked." I pulled my picture up with the other two. "The only difference is, I wasn't going to die that easily." I winked and went on to the next four. "I'm not sure what happened for the next six years but on February 15 of this year another girl was killed, then another two, six months after that. Then one today." I watched the others and they were soaking it all in.

"I think it has something to do with me." I said and Sara nodded in agreement.

"That makes sense." Sara stepped toward the table. "The killer wanted to try everything, he tried a blonde, red head and brunette, a blue-eyed, green-eyed and brown-eyed girl. The only problem is, the brunette didn't die and he must have found that out some how and decided to give it another try."

"That doesn't explain why he killed four more girls." Grissom said.

"Sure it does," Catherine stepped forward. "He didn't remember what eye color she had. That was a long time ago, the details can get a little hazy in that time, even for a killer on the hunt." She moved all of the pictures of brunettes off the the right side, mine included. "Cadi was first, but she lived. Her eyes are green, then next girl had brown eyes. He must have seen her somewhere to know that her eyes aren't brown but not close enough to know if they were really green or blue."

"So what you're saying is," Nick was next to talk. "He killed two girls on the same night because he didn't know which to kill. But then why kill the fourth girl?"

"It's his way of saying he knows what you look like and he might be coming back for you." Grissom said

Nick looked at me, "Do you know who it is?" I didn't want to say yes, but I had to. This guy had to go away.

I nodded and I thought I could see them all look at me like I'd let a killer go. "I know who it is. He was never put away because of the judge that took the case."

I think Grissom got mad, "Why did you not say anything?"

"I didn't know that it was the same guy until DNA came back and when it did, you weer already gone." I sighed and leaned forward, watching the pictures on the table. "He was going to be put away but the judge said there wasn't enough evidence to get a warrant to 'invade' his home." I quoted the word invade. That was what the judge had called it.

"Why not?" Sara asked. "If you saw him, that should be enough."

"There's a reason." I stood up, I really didn't feel good at this point. "The guy who did it had a family in high places. Mostly the judge. That was his brother." Nick snorted.

"That's a bullshit reason. Why didn't it go to another judge."

"They had different last names, no one knew it was his brother, but I remembered seeing them together somewhere." I shook my head. "I have no idea where he is, but I think I know a way we can find him." Everyone looked at me expectantly. "Bait."

It was an hour after that argument. The idea I had wasn't the brightest but they really didn't need to start a screaming match over it.

(FLASHBACK) :

"You've got to be kidding me!" Nick started to yell. I wasn't entirely sure why but he seemed more than just unhappy at my idea.

"No I'm not kidding." I was keeping calm. Yelling was not on my to-do list as of right now. "Who else doesn't agree with the idea?" Everyone raised their hands. Everyone agreed to disagree with the idea. "Well if you have a better idea, tell me."

Everyone watched each other for a second before all of their voices came together, one by one. That's when the real yelling started. (END)

I was walking down the walkway to my car, ready to leave and scan the casinos of Vegas. I never go out, ever. There was a reason for it, but tonight, nothing mattered.

A fifteen minute drive later and I was on the Strip. Warrick would have loved to be with me right now. He hadn't gambled in months but there's no harm in a night on the town. I was walking down when I saw someone in the reflection of one of the windows. I knew it was him, I'd never forget.

I didn't want to be out where he could lose me. This was my chance.

(FLASHBACK) :

During their screams and yells, I took my time sneaking out to the hall for my escape. There wasn't a way in hell that I was going to let this happen again. Not even to a girl I didn't know. I knew what it was like and I wouldn't live through it again for the world. (END)

I walked into the Bellagio and decided a table would be best so I went over to the black jack table and waited. I played for about another thirty minutes before I felt someone come up behind me.

I looked around the room and I knew they wouldn't leave me to just go out for myself at a time like this. Warrick was waiting at the other end of the room, Nick a yard or two to his right, the rest were unseen by me.

I felt hands on my shoulders, a small squeeze, and a hand moved away before a drink was offered to me. I watched the glass for a moment before taking it. My eyes made my way over to Warrick again and he was nodding to me. He must have seen something I didn't and knew it would do something to me, that's what they were counting on.

I quit the game and scooted away from the table, glass in hand. I turned around and saw Greg standing there. I was pissed. "What the fuck, Greg?"

He chuckled and took another glass from a man walking by, nodded to him and held the glass up to mine. "Try to look happy, I brought you a drink." He held out his arm and I took it. He led me away from the table toward the elevator and waited with me. "They found the guy's name on the registration and he is staying on the same floor as the room we are headed to."

"I don't understand." The door to the elevator opened just then and we went inside. "Why are we going to a room?"

"Well, the others think that if he's after you, he'll follow and that's where the others are waiting for us and they're following a man around the bottom floor with similar characteristics as the guy we're looking for."

"So you thought you'd get a little action while we wait?" I laughed and took a drink. "What is this?" It was pretty gross if I do say so myself.

"Mango water." He smiled and drank some. I could tell he didn't like it either because he made a disgusted face.

"Did you know a mango dipped in water isn't the ideal kind of mango water?" I laughed again and that prompted Greg to move forward. His hand touched my cheek and he leaned in. "What are you doing?"

His face held a small and heartfelt smile, "You promised you'd make it up to me, right?" I giggled at him, I very rarely giggled but it was well deserved for the event. He leaned in and the most wonderful thing happened.

It had been a very long time since I felt comfort and never in my life had that comfort felt like this. It was sweet like vanilla and rough like sandpaper, it was the definition of pure bliss. The thing you wait for your whole life and you only find once.

It was only a moment, if felt like a lifetime, before the elevator doors opened and he pulled away. "It wasn't as long as I had hoped, but maybe the lab will let us keep the room for the night after this guy is caught." He winked at me and pulled me out into the hall.

We walked up to one of the rooms and I noted that it was a Villa. Those were nice and I didn't really believe that the lab funded such a nice room but if they did, they went all out for this guy.

Greg opened the door to the room and I could hear the door to the stairway opening so I leaned in and wrapped my arm around him, glancing behind him. He made it.

He was definitely not the happiest but it was going to be a good day if the rest were ready for the catch. He walked up to us and pushed us through the door, unknowing to me and him, into a group of officers.

"Put your hands up!" One of them yelled. I watched as he tried to run, but ran into Brass and four other officers.

"Not so fast. We would like to have a word with you." Brass said, holding his hands in front of him while gesturing another cop to cuff him. After taking him away, all of the cops started to high-five each other. Brass walked in when they all walked out, "That was pretty easy. I guess a little competition makes a man lose his temper."

He laughed and walked out, shaking his head. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I pulled it out. It was from Catherine. **We were watching the whole time, thank elevator security cameras. Grissom said since Greg paid for the room and the guy is caught, keep it.**

I chuckled. "You lied to me." The door to the room shut and I looked up.

"I know I did." He walked forward and took the phone from my hand, tossing it on a chair nearby. It was like bliss all over again. Greg was a gentleman to begin with but this was insane. He was gentle with the kissing at first and that was the way it was supposed to be. We made our way to the bed and landed with a small sigh of the bed, forgetting the day ever happened and we were just here. All of us, our mind and bodies, we were here right were we needed to be.

**_..._**

**_I hope you would review and tell me what you like/dislike about the story. Any comments on things I should add and should disregard in later chapters are highly recommended. Being apart of the story is only a review away, Just a name, a description and a field of work in the lab/field and that can be arranged. Or even an idea for the story or any of its later cases. I appreciate the time you took to read this and I hope you have insight that you would kindly share with me. Enjoy!_**


	4. What You Really Want

**DISCLAIMER: I own none of CSI, only the case they are working, the people in it and my own characters.**

**...**

Here's what I learned about bliss this time around.

Bliss is when he pulls you in and holds you close, just close enough for you to know what his intentions are. Close enough to be able to look into his eyes and see what you've always been looking for and know that it is as close to real as you can possibly get.

Bliss is what he does after his hand meets your face and his other hand gets wrapped around your torso, pulling you in. Pulling you toward him until there is no room for air in between your bodies because he wants you as close as you can so when he looks down at you, you know that you're his.

Bliss is knowing why he's leaning down, holding your face, grabbing your ass. Why he's close enough to kiss you but doesn't because he wants to wait until he's looked into your eyes long enough to know that your intentions are as real as his.

Bliss happens when that moment is finally over and his lips are on yours, devouring you in more ways than the ones that meet the eye. Devouring your soul and life, pulling you into him until you don't want to be anywhere else, melting into him like you know what's coming next and you're just waiting for it.

Bliss is when he moves you away from the door and to the bed, pushing you down, gentle but still rough, the kisses getting heavier and sweeter.

Bliss is when it comes down to that one moment, the one you wait a lifetime for, the one that means the most, the one that you remember for the rest of your life.

The moment when his shirt comes off and your already messed up blouse is ready to come off right after. When your skin touches his and it's like a heat passes between the both of you and you want it to last forever.

The moment where all of the clothes are on the floor, the sheets rustling together, his face moving from yours and down your body, kissing your skin, his hot breath on your curves. When his hands move down your sides and rest at your thighs, squeezing slightly.

The moment when you see his eyes looking into your own as he moves down to your boobs, cupping one and nuzzling the other. When you can feel the need in his tongue and the want in the way he holds you.

The moment where he comes back up to you, watching your face, readying his member, seeing the fierce and willing look in your own eyes. When the look is mirrored all over his face and you are more than just ready for it.

The moment when it happens and it's much better than you had ever imagined. When his face reconnects with yours and his hands are at your ass, holding and wanting you as close as you can get.

The moment where the feeling you had in between your legs suddenly becomes real and he is holding you steady as he thrusts back and forth, friction being created in the most pleasurable way possible.

The whole event consists of holding, rubbing, squeezing, exploring, watching and kissing, and that event is the one that gets taken for granted the most but truthfully, it is the most wonderful experience when handled the right way. This way.

Your bodies move together, swaying like the first time was the thirtieth or fiftieth time. Holding him close as you kiss the curve of his neck as he gently bites your shoulder, holding his moans to a minimum. You want more than just the minimum, you want to hear how much he likes it.

You let him know, you bite him back, a little harder just to see what makes him tick. He ticks just enough to moan a little louder and he watches as your eyes light up at the sound and it makes him moan just a little more because that look in your eyes ticks him a little farther.

Its the event of cause and effect and your pleasure pleasures them and their pleasure pleasures you until the pleasure continues for as long as you can make it last. This moment was going to last until he was finished, which sounded like it wasn't going to last that long but it was an hour later when it was over.

His face said it all, he finished with a tight squeeze of my thigh, a small bite on the neck and the best moan he had done yet. His breathing was uneven and heavy, his hair held beads of sweat and he was holding me like he didn't want to let go.

Pure bliss was what we were looking for and in that hour and a half, we found it, held onto it, wanted more of it. We laid still together for a long time, listening to the heartbeats of the other, circling our fingers over each others skin, learning to breathe like normal again.

He was what I had wanted and what he said next was the cherry to the top of my ice cream, I like it better than cake, "I love you, Cadi, and that was the best experience I've ever had. Maybe next time we can do it in one of our own homes, but before then, I want to be a part of your life as much as I can."

"I want to meet your daughter."

**...**

**_I hope you would review and tell me what you like/dislike about the story. Any comments on things I should add and should disregard in later chapters are highly recommended. Being apart of the story is only a review away, Just a name, a description and a field of work in the lab/field and that can be arranged. Or even an idea for the story or any of its later cases. I appreciate the time you took to read this and I hope you have insight that you would kindly share with me. Enjoy!_**


End file.
